What Do You Know About Money?
Everything you’ve ever known about money is likely what you’ve learned from your family, your community, and the media. Some of these ideas may sound like, ‘there is never enough money” or ‘you have to work hard for it.” Or maybe you heard that “money causes greed and corruption.” Sound familiar?
And what were your family’s opinions regarding rich people? That “they’re snobs?” “They probably got their money from immoral means.” Or maybe you learned that “people with money don’t give a $%# about people without money.” And that, “you can’t be good and rich at the same time.”
What did you observe about your parents’ relationship with money? Was there conflict whenever they discussed money? Did they often say, “we can’t afford it?”
What Is Your Money Story?
We all come with our own money story. Either “there is never enough” or ‘you have to work hard for it.” Beneath the words are a whole range of emotions. Because money is an emotional subject.
If you want to become conscious of your money story start by becoming aware of what emotions are stirred up when you hear the word, money. Do you feel a knot in your stomach when you talk about money? Do you feel a sense of lack, dread, insecurity, or inadequacy? Or does the word money stir up feelings of power within you? Feelings of fun and adventure. The feelings you have around money reveal your subconscious beliefs about money. They provide a synopsis of your money story.
How’s Your Relationship With Money?
What is your current relationship with money? Is money currently showing up as an unavailable partner? Or the lover that is here for a good time not for a long time? Or do you feel a sense of abandonment?
Do you have a difficult time attracting money into your life? Or does it come in easily but slips through your fingers just as quickly? How does money show up in your life right now? Is it a consistent flow? Or is it more like a desert? Maybe, it ebbs and flows in your life. The way money shows up in your life also illuminates your beliefs around money.
What’s Your Financial Blueprint?
We all have a financial blueprint. It comprises of our beliefs around money – both conscious and subconscious, our behavior towards money, and our personalities. These beliefs were shaped by our families, society, and the media.
And this is overlaid with our personal money story, based on our experiences with money. What’s your current mindset regarding money? Realize that mindsets can be changed. Your experiences with money are likely a product of your mindset about money.
Forget Everything You’ve Ever Known About Money!
If you are ever going to change your money story, you must forget everything you’ve ever known about money. And start with a blank canvas. Begin with what you would like your money story to be. And the new relationship you would like to nurture with money.
Change Your Relationship With Money
Imagine a healthy relationship with a significant other. How would you describe it? Supportive and faithful. How do you treat money in your life? Passing it around freely? Do you spend time getting to know your money? How would you treat a significant person in your life? You would spend quality time with them. Why not be that way with money? Go over your budget. Create a plan for your finances. Write down the relationship you want with the money.
Question Your Beliefs Around Money
If you want to change your relationship with money, you must change your beliefs about money. Some common beliefs about money include; to earn a lot of money you must work hard. And that making a lot of money comes with making tremendous sacrifices. Sacrifices such as time with family. Question your subconscious beliefs.
Have you met people with a lot of money and who have loving relationships and strong family bonds?
Was talking about money taboo in your family? Were there conflicts in your home around the subject of money? If that was the case, you might want to block money out of your life for fear of conflict.
What did your family say about wealthy people? Did they believe that people with money were somehow immoral? Then you may, subconsciously, do all you can to avoid money from flowing to you. Who’d want to associate with people with “bad” values?
Rescript Those Beliefs
Rescript negative beliefs to ones that support a more positive relationship with money. Such as, “money is good” and “money can be used for good.” Personalize those beliefs, “I am good with money.” Repeat those throughout the day.
Research has shown that the act of writing can change the way you think. Write down new beliefs about money. Beliefs such as, “having money provides me the flexibility to do what I want. It allows me to help my family.”
And rescript your beliefs about people with money. A person can be wealthy and still be faithful, thoughtful, and kind. If you have deeply entrenched negative beliefs about money, it may be difficult initially to replace those with new beliefs. You will feel like a fraud. You may need to start by first neutralizing your negative feelings about money.
Whenever a negative emotion comes up for you about money, do not put too much energy into feeding that emotion. It’s not about ignoring emotions. Emotions are there to teach us what is actually going on within our subconscious minds. Instead, observe the emotion and make it a habit to pivot to a more empowering thought.
I had a client who had intense negative emotions about money from her childhood. Each time she had a negative thought about money, she learned to pivot to a positive thought by thinking about dancing. She loved dancing. it was hard for her to initially replace her negative feelings about money with positive beliefs. But she could neutralize it by thinking of dancing. Soon, the subject of money no longer elicited negative emotions.
Your Self-Worth Is Not Equal To Your Net Worth
Question your identity around money. Is your identity tied to your financial situation? Recognize you are not your net worth. How do you self-identify when it comes to money? If you closely identify with being poor, you can do all the wishing you’d like for things to change, and they will not.
How would your family and friends view you if you were to win $10? Listen to how you perceive yourself with money. Artists are poor. Spiritual people don’t want money.
Reset your financial thermostat
Imagine being someone with a lot of money. Create a vision for the life of a person who has all the money they need. Recognize that you get more of what you focus on.
The challenge is when you continue to focus on the lack of funds in your life. Chances are, you’ll attract more of that. Focus instead on what life would be like with a lot of money. Where would you be living? Where would you be shopping?
Train your mind to focus on the life you want, not the life you don’t want. It may be a stretch for some, especially if they’ve always struggled with a lack of money. It takes practice to create a different reality.
Ask yourself, “If I had all the money I ever needed, I would …” “If I had all the money I ever needed, my life would be …”
Imagine Your Future As If It Has Already Happened
In your mind, imagine your future as if it has already happened. Infuse it with feeling. Money is energy. You don’t attract money through the sense of lack, as you don’t attract love by feeling unloved. In a meditative state, create sensory-rich images in your mind of what it would be like to be wealthy.
Here’s where the resistance comes in: you may be asking yourself, “how can I imagine having a lot of money when I have always been poor?” f you are having trouble imagining what it would be like to have a lot of money, imagine what abundance feels like? A warm summer day, a hug, walking in nature. Abundance surrounds us. Live as if your wishes were already fulfilled. Imagine a new net worth statement.
Allow Yourself To Receive Money
You will start to attract money, but you must be open to receiving it. It may show up in ways you never imagined. Watch out for it.
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Through one on one coaching, webinars and public speaking Jennifer helps people achieve a more fulfilling life.
Some of her books include Women and Money: 7 Principles Every Woman Needs to Know to Be Financially Prepared in Any Economy and Growing Up With Money: Raising Financially Resilient Kids in an Age of Uncertainty. Jennifer can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org