By Jennifer Thompson


January 31, 2022

Here’s The Deal

Almost half of all marriages in North America end up in divorce. One of the most significant sources of conflict is over the topic of money. According to the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, by the end of 2021, total household debt in the US exceeded a staggering $15 trillion.

Young people are starting their lives with a noose around their neck. Student loan debt in 2020 reached $1.56 trillion.

Across the globe, money is a significant cause of stress. And financial anxiety is not restricted to those without money!

All this comes as no surprise. I suspect most people would feel more comfortable baring their bodies on a first date than getting naked with their finances.

Yet money touches all aspects of our lives; our health and significant relationships, careers, and even our relationship with ourselves. Our relationship with money affects our general well-being.

The Root of The Problem

How we manage our finances begins with the relationship we have with money. It affects how we handle other aspects of our lives!

There is still a pervasive idea that money is the root of all evil. And rich folk are corrupt, selfish, entitled %$#!!!

Money is not the root of all evil. The heart of our money issues starts with the beliefs we inherited in our childhood. Many of us were raised in homes where the subject of money was either taboo or rarely discussed openly. If we did hear our parents talk about money, it was probably to say, “we can’t afford it.”

study conducted by Merrill Lynch and Age Wave showed that 61% of women surveyed said they would rather discuss their death than discuss the subject of money. And why not?

Let’s Talk About Money

Below are eight tips to help you nurture a healthier relationship with money.

1. Be Honest With Yourself

Take an honest look at where you stand right now by looking at your net worth statement — do you owe more than you own?

If you owe more than you own, what can you do right now to change that? Double up on your debt payments or double up on your contributions to your savings?

2. Know Where It’s Going!

Do you spend more than you earn? Keep good records of your expenses, savings, and investments –where is your money going? Check bank and credit card statements to ensure no mistakes or evidence of fraud. There are countless apps to track your spending and your saving.

3. Create a Budget With Your Values and Future Goals in Mind.

What portion of your income do you save? Cut down on compulsive shopping. Before you spend, ask yourself, “Does this get me closer to the life I want?” Find ways to save in each area of your budget.

If you have never budgeted before, it will take patience and practice sticking to it. Based on your current expenses, what percentage is going towards your goals?

4. Pay Yourself First

Put aside at least 10% of your income towards your goals. This practice is a form of self-care. How you allocate your money depends on your goals and when you hope to achieve them. If you lose sight of them along the way, keep going back to what your values are. They are like the North Star, keeping you aligned.

5. Deal with Debt

Pay off all credit card balances, especially those with the highest interest. Reduce the number of credit cards you carry. If your credit is terrible, repair it. Seek the services of a debt counselor if you’re overwhelmed by your debt.

6. Build an Emergency Fund

Save an equivalent of about 3 to 6 months’ income to deal with emergencies like car repairs, job loss, or short-term illness.

7. Become Aware of Your Emotional Triggers

Money means different things to different people. And we all respond differently to money. For some, it is a cause of distress and fear. For others, money is a source of power. What emotions are stirred up for you when dealing with money?

Become mindful about your existing relationship with money. Is money like the lover that’s here only for a good time and not a long time? Or is money for you like an emotionally unavailable partner?

Maybe, you are one of the lucky ones — where money showed up more akin to a committed spouse, who’s got your back.

What does money mean for you? Know your emotional triggers around money. How do you feel each time you have to make a financial decision. Are you aware of your money personality type?

8. Get Acquainted with Your Money Personality Type

There are five money personality types. Spender, Saver, Accumulator, Avoider, and Money Averse. Which one are you?

Do you see money as the source of all the problems in this world? Or are you an avoider, preferring to keep your head in the sand when it comes to your finances? Educate yourself about all things related to money! Knowledge is power. Become a badass at money!

Bringing It All Together

Your relationship with money and your money personality type essentially make up your money blueprint. Become well-acquainted with your money blueprint and make the necessary changes to nurture a healthier relationship with money. It will positively impact other areas of your life.

This article contains affiliate links. I may receive a commission for items purchased through these links (at no additional cost to you).

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