The Transformation Myth And Why Nothing Seems to Change

By Jennifer Thompson


June 2, 2022

It’s way past mid-year; what’s happened to your goals?

Each time the new year comes upon us, we feel tremendous pressure to transform- whether we believe in resolutions. We join a gym, tell ourselves we’re going to start saving more, complete the novel that we began five years ago, spend more time with our kids, run daily, etc.

It’s almost June; how are your attempts at transformation stacking up? Research by Stanton University shows that about 80% of people fail to keep their New Year’s resolutions.

What were you hoping to transform?

Maybe, you hoped to change something in your life. Your fitness level, improvement in your relationships, saving more money. But nothing seems to stick.

What’s your story? Is it real?

You can set your goals, download the fitness app, dream all the dreams, and read that stack of self-help books, but nothing will ever change until you rewrite the stories you’ve told yourself.

Stories such as I’m not good with money; all the women in my family are overweight; I attract unavailable men. These stories repeated over time become unchallenged truths we have come to believe about ourselves.

The way to start rewriting your damaging scripts is to question them: is it real?

Reflect, Reset, Revise

What one area in your life are you trying to change? Can you identify the beliefs behind the behavior you’d like to change? Maybe you’ve wanted to lose weight.

What are some of the stories you’ve told yourself about your body? Maybe you’ve said to yourself that your body is a by-product of your genetics. Is it accurate that you can’t lose weight because of your genes? Be honest with yourself.

If there is something you want but feel like you can’t have or can’t do, challenge the stories to see if they are true.


I remember the last rejection email I receive in response to my query letter. I had already sent over twenty emails to various agents, and most didn’t bother to respond.

By then, I was discouraged. Success in my previous job came so quickly for me. But since pursuing a career in writing it’s been a challenge. I always believed I was skilled at manifesting great things with little effort.

What’s the resistance?

I felt like I was coming up against resistance. But I couldn’t put my finger on anything in particular. I was beginning to question if I should continue writing as a career goal.

Maybe I suck as a writer? I read books, listen to the pros, and even attend various writing retreats. Self-discipline has never been a problem for me. I can sit down, do the research, check my work, craft an idea and write all day.

It’s taken a few years to get traction as a writer. I had to explore the subconscious beliefs I may have told myself about writing. Once I was able to replace them with positive beliefs, things started to shift within me and subsequently in my reality.

It often appears that no amount of resolve, self-help books, gym memberships, or YouTube videos can change us till we rewrite the stories we’ve told ourselves about who we are. Are you ready to do that?

What is something you are struggling with? Are there stories you’ve told yourself about this issue? Is it real? How can you rescript these?

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